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       Jeanie57's posts and comments across Aidpage (2)

      Does Anyone Out There Really Care????

      Posted in Jeanie57 on Jul 5, 2007... modified on Jul 5, 2007

       Hello,  My name is Jeanie.  I am  57 years old, and at the very end of my emotional rope! I am out of money out of time, and out of options. I do not know where to turn!  God help me Please!!  I have been separated from my husband for over a year.  Since then I have held several jobs all of which were complete dead ends. My husband is a retired factory worker living on a very fixed income, and he is unable to support me financially outside of our marriage.
       When he retired from his job we moved South, and I gave up a full time job. I had to move from there back to my home state where I am originally from, because I could not afford to live in a separate residence in the South. Nor could either one of us afford to get a divorce, because we could not afford to pay lawyers.  I gave up my home, and  all rights to it because my husband had promised me that he would “help me out”,  NOT!!  I was naïve in assuming that he would. He had promised me that he would pay off my credit cards and give me a substantial part of what our home was worth. I was very stupid not to have obtained this in writing.  Needless to say he didn’t do what he promised. I moved back to my home state using credit I did not really have to use. 
       Once I had gotten settled I did obtain a good job, but I was seriously under qualified for it.  I accepted the job because I desperately needed an income at the time.  I lasted at that job for approx.. 5 months, and it was very it was a very stressful period trying to fit into a job that I did not have the experience for.  My employer finally let me go, with assurances that I would be able to get unemployment.  NOT!!  I did not qualify for unemployment because I did not make enough within a certain period, and because I had not worked long enough. Since then I have been working the odd jobs for a temp agency, but those odd jobs were few. 
       I come from an era where the wife stayed at home while the husband went out and earned a paycheck.  I would have worked outside our home, but my husband preferred me at home. I was a housewife and mother for many years and I do not regret those years.  My children are now grown and doing well in their own lives.  But because I stayed home and took care of my home and raised my children, I have not the “marketable” skills that would make it possible for me to obtain a good job and earn a comfortable living.  I also have several age related ailments, while not disabling, make it very difficult for me to work a full-time job outside my home.  I would love to get training in a marketable skill and develop a business, and work from my home. I could possibly obtain a grant, (impossible to get unless you hire someone),  or educational loan for training,….(govt. grants)……“this is also a huge money making machine for internet scammers!!!” 
       I am unable to hold down a full-time job and go to school at the same time. It is more than I can handle at my age, considering my current health situation.  I have a disease called, “cervical spondylosis”.  It is very painful and debilitating.  I also have bone spurs in the heels and pads of my feet, osteoarthritis, and a small tumor at the base of my brain. Thankfully this tumor is, as far as I know, benign.  I have been told by my doctor that I need to have yet another MRI, of which I have had many!  I can not afford it!   I tried to get help from a community organization called, “Volunteers In Medicine”, but …..again I do not qualify because I have to be completely uninsured. This is another reason I have not yet tried to obtain a divorce,  as long as I remain married, I am still under his insurance. 
       I am not a lazy person, I exercise and try to keep myself in shape, but I have been so severely depressed that some days I can not even function. I have scoured the internet in hopes of finding some kind of work at home, for an online job.  God help me!  Several months ago….as now,  I was so desperate for a way to make some money that I fell for an internet scam.  It was one of those “Nigerian” scams.  I was very stupid and very naïve, and very desperate.  Desperate people will do stupid stuff, as I well know.  As a result of that scam my bank account was wiped out, along with some of the banks money.  I tried everything to get help.  I called all the Federal offices I could think of.  Secret Service, CIA, FBI, etc., you name it and I called it.  No one would help me.  I understand how being involved might have made me look less than innocent, but I truly did not realize until it was too late.  I was an unknowing participant.  I have always been a very trusting individual and willing to believe that there are honest people in this world.  But, my trust has been betrayed time and again. Just a couple of weeks ago now I was talked into investing money I don’t even have on an internet business that I was promised would earn me quick money. I had one credit card with some credit left on it, now I have none!  Scammed again!!! I am sick to death of all the lies, and untruths that are flooding the internet!!  These people were very smooth and they know just what to say to have you believing them!!  How do these people sleep at night knowing what they do to people!!! I am not a dummy, just way too trusting.
       My trust in our Government to protect its American Citizens against fraud and other unscrupulous acts has been broken.  Our government officials and the politicians who are running this United States Government are all out for themselves, first and foremost.  They sit around giving themselves raises probably with our tax dollars, while people like me are lost in the shuffle of government bureaucracy. 
       Now I find myself in the position of having to beg someone to save me from living in the streets.  I have been living off credit for some months just to survive. Now my credit is shot and I can not obtain a loan, needless to say.  I do at least have a good vehicle, about the only thing I got from my marriage worth anything,  but even it is going to need maintenance soon.  I am praying for a miracle because I am all out of time and money.  I am tired and my spirit is broken, and I am very scared.  I have registered with 2 websites where folks are allowed to “beg for money”.  On one of them I have yet to receive any help, and the other site, I paid for the opportunity to tell my story, they took my money and never did publish the story!! I do at least have this computer and I have been working as a, “chat host”,  for a couple of internet sites. Basically chat hosting means stripping for money. It is NOT what I want to do, but was forced to do to survive!  I do not want to live this way!!! 
       Someone please help me to make my life worth living.  I just want a chance to be someone before its too late for me!!  I have rent due in 2 days, and I do not have the money to pay for it.  God help me!!  Please!!!  If anyone can find it in their heart to help me I know that it could change my life for the better!  Is there anyone out there who really cares????  If there is, please renew my faith, and I will get down on my knee’s and pray to God to bless you, and Thank You All!!!!!

      Sincerely,
      Jeanie

      Jeanie57

      Posted in Jeanie57 on Jul 5, 2007

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